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3分鐘學會一個雅思7分句(第81期)
2021-03-29 15:47   作者:新航道   閱讀量:

Today, many tasks at home or work have been done by robots. Is this a positive or negative development?


應對上面這個題目,學生在讓步論述中寫了這樣幾個句子:


Admittedly, the development of robots can bring negative influence. Many people might confront serious problems such as unemployment. There is no denying that if more and more work are done by robots, the demand for human labor will drop quickly, which may bring lots of social problems. 


教師修改后如下:


Admittedly, the widespread application of robots may cause some repercussions. To begin with, many people might be confronted with unemployment, since various occupations such as cashier and server in the restaurant can be easily replaced by robots, which consequently triggers a series of social problems.  


? 學生整體意群信息還是比較完整的,回應的觀點也比較到位,但主要問題是句間的邏輯點過于碎片化了,盡量能夠做到信息點的整合。按照總→分的結構行文。To begin with雖然表達簡單,但是卻是邏輯的“粘合劑”。


另外第三句的there is no denying… 和前一句可作合并,后面的demand for human labor 和前面的unemployment 意思基本一樣,因此可以合并,將這里的句子寫成原因狀語since various occupations…


另外主題句將can替換成may,表示的是一種讓步。


? 詞匯上的選用注意靈活一些:


* 機器人畢竟是人去使用,所以application相較于“萬金油”的development 更加精確;

negative influence可替換repercussions;

confront被動用法表示“使面臨”,而主動 sb. confronts sth. 表示一種積極的含義“勇于面對”;

lots of social problems中lots of比較口語化,可以改成一系列a series of。


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